a weirdo with no name (salophile) wrote,
a weirdo with no name
salophile

  • Mood:

...And the strangest things seem suddenly routine

Me: Do you do much car restyling, sir?
Customer: Well, when I do I usually just sick a couple kilograms in the seat and send it over the border...

Coworker: I hate this job. I get so little money.
Me: Yeah, me too.
Coworker: Sometimes I think I should quit and go into porn, but the last person I met who did that was kind of skeezy. He injected meth up my ass.
Me: What?
Coworker: He said it was lube, but I knew it was a syringe with the needle broken off.

Future roommate's boyfriend: How are the implants?
Me: The what?
FRB: The breast implants.
Me: ... I got my nipples pierced, not breast implants!
FRB: Well it's not like I go around staring at your breasts!
Tags: quotage, wtf
Subscribe

  • (no subject)

    So for anyone who hasn't managed to catch any of my moaning for the last few days, I am sick. Really, really sick. So sick that I'm not even looking…

  • Waking up with pants off at four in the afternoon.

    I think I'm a little late to vote in the Washington caucus today, but I'm feeling so sick I don't think it really matters. I did have an interesting…

  • Hark, I bring you no content.

    I'd post about how I'm alive but won't be online much because I'm at my aunt's on limited Internet access, and how I'll be back on Sunday because I'm…

  • Post a new comment

    Error

    default userpic
    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.
  • 4 comments